Monday, August 6, 2007

These last few days....

Last Thursday I think it was, my husband and I decided to go to Steubenville and see The Joe Zelek band play his free concert across from the police station at the Fort Steuben. I was all excited to go until I found out my brother-n-law and his girlfriend were going too. I cannot stand my brother-n-law's girlfriend and truthfully I don't like my brother-n-law all that much anymore either. All he cares about is getting high and drunk everyday. He has his own apartment but he doesn't pay his bills because all of his money goes on drugs and alcohol. AGGGGGHHH!! This drives me crazy because here my husband and I are struggling every month to pay the bills and make sure we have food to eat and this 36 year old "boy", I will call him because he will never grow up, only cares about himself. This stupid girlfriend of his keeps eying my husband and I'm sick of it. When they walked down to the Fort Steuben to see Joe Zelek with us she had on this tank top that showed her fat sticking out and her boobs sticking out. And as if her boobs weren't sticking out enough while we're on the elevator she stands there across from my husband and pushes her boobs out more. Ugghhhh I cannot stand this girl!!

And if that's not enough my drunken brother-n-law keeps throwing her out of his apartment and she sits down my mother-n-laws and cries and pouts and says "I'm never going back to him" and she goes right back to him either that night or the next day!! Every time they get into a fight he throws her out and she ends up down the hall at my mother-n-laws and every time she goes right back to him. I am sick of hearing her whine about how he treats her. He will never change!! My husband and my mother-n-law agree with me 100%! This 36 year old "boy" will never , ever grow up!!

Ok now that I got that out of my system what happened at the Joe Zelek concert is that there were way too many people there and my husband and I both had a panic attack. Not only that but it was way too hot also. I thought the Zoloft would help to where I could go to things like this but I guess I was wrong again. I wasn't having a good time anyway because of his brother and his stupid girlfriend. Every time I think about these 2 I want to scream! It's like they trigger my mood swings. I am 27 years old and am younger than both of them and I am way more mature than both of them. He is 36 and she is 31 and they act like freaking teenagers!!!

Ok I have to quit talking about them because now I'm getting madder than hell!! So on to something good to talk about. Saturday we went to Treasure Island! It is a wonderful flea market and it is huge. Yes there were a lot of people there but the difference with Treasure Island and the concert is that at Treasure Island everyone was moving around so I wasn't crowded in. It was wonderful there. My husband got a brand new pair of Air Jordan tennis shoes for only $15. I got a printer/copier/scanner/fax machine for $25 and my mother-n-law bought us each a paper weight for $1 a piece. My husbands is a picture of an eagle and mine is dolphins. She also got a t-shirt that says "Someone special calls me Nana" and she bought some clothes for her baby grandson, my other brother-n-law's kid. I also got a pair of Calvin Klein shorts for $2 and my husband got a Craftsman tool set for $8. I am going back next month and buying my niece something for her B-day there. They have so much stuff it is hard to get through it all in an hour and that is all we had was an hour because we had to pick my mom up from work. I felt like a kid in a candy store, lol!

Now I want to talk about something else that is bothering me a lot lately. My dad is getting worse with his mental illness. His dad is in a mental institution and I'm afraid my dad is going to be in there next because he is angry about everything. He refuses to get the help he needs and I don't know what to do. I feel so helpless because I can't do anything for him. He has to want the help and in his mind he has it under control. Yeah right, he has never had it under control and never will. I just wish there was something I could do to convince him to get the help he needs.

Well I feel better now that I have all of this off my chest. It feels great to write my feelings down. :)

Oh I almost forgot, here are a few articles I wrote about depression, social anxiety disorder and Bi-Polar disorder:

http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/192703/diagnosis_and_treatment_of_bipolar.html

http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/154581/writing_as_a_self_therapy.html

http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/153553/living_with_social_anxiety_disorder.html

http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/136524/the_ups_and_downs_of_depression.html

These articles are for those who are suffering from depression, social anxiety disorder and Bi-Polar Disorder. I hope these articles help those who suffer as I did. Anyone else can read them too.

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